Saturday, March 20, 2010

Mix Up

We're now down to the last few days of the academic year and I'm still apparently hanging by a thin strand into surviving my fourth year in U.P. and my fifth year in college in general. I've gotten a bit lax as time passed and I'm feeling my last days of my U.P. life is about to end without having a grand conclusion to my college life as a whole. I've always been pessimistic during these times of the semester because honestly, I never did try to excel in my studies to a point that I never had a semester free of a failing grade for the past years. I'm a lax person. Then again, what has really bothered me is the fact that almost everyone in my generation(batch) is about to graduate and I'm already feeling tired hearing people about their excitement that in a few weeks' time, their college life would be over. I'm jealous of them. But then again, I have to struggle because sooner or later, with the way I live my life, I'd be the last one left. What a great way to start hell week!

I feel lazy today. It's been one of my most unproductive days as an "enthusiastic" person. Yesterday, I was excited to go home because I know today had a task that I'd really enjoy. I really didn't plan on going home prior to yesterday because I know I have lots of things to do this weekend and I can't be bothered. But I had to sacrifice a bit so I'd be able to chauffeur my mom to and from the office. Asll I need then was just the proper tool. Turns out, the last minute deprived me of the proper tool.
I can't count the many times I've driven a manual transmission car without an instructor bugging my right ear. Then again, those instances were in the parking lot of the office when I had to move the car to let another get in or out the driveway, which by the way only required two gears: first and reverse. Driving a manual for more than those two gears was my kryptonite. I've only driven thus once so goodluck to me when my mom asked to drive the manual.
Actually, another car was available and joy of joys it's an automatic transmission. But my mom was afraid that I'd end up with an accident with it so she said we'd just commute to the office. Damn! What a wasted day! And I'm pissed! My spirits are at an all time low. I feel that my mom doesn't trust me. In her eyes, I'm always under my brother's shadow. Another great way to start hell week!

In my many times riding the bus with anyone, only six people had me pumped up into talking with them for the whole trip. I prefer sleeping whenever I travel so, the person depriving me of sleep must really be interesting to get me into a conversation the whole trip.
Light beamed at me asking me to read something on my phone. It was the most interesting message I've received in months and the conversation that followed was even more unexpected. I can't say it's the happiest conversation I've ever had but it's one I'd never forget. A conversation with hushed voices in a noisy bus, that was a challenge! I'm really glad that I had that conversation. Now, that's a better way to start hell week!

I was spilling beans out, a whole bunch of spoiled ones actually, but then you always tried to change the topic. I didn't get why you did that but I realized something. Problems come everyday. Some one can do something about, some none. The only thing one has to do is stand up and move on. Dwelling on the problem won't solve anything. Move on. Many things will come on the way. Walk tall. Live with no regrets. There's always light after the dark.
Bring it on hell week!!!!

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